Getting to Know my Sister (Differently)

It's been eight days since I found out my only sibling had died.

It has been a whirlwind of clean up and meetings and parent and pet management.  Travel.  Lots of travel between my home and hers.  After a few days, I was able to sleep again at night.  Eating isn't a problem - so don't worry about that.  I'm a stress eater :)  On the plus side, I lost 5 lbs this week.

Planning a service. Trying to decide what needs to be handled when.
As a very task-oriented person, that part of it isn't too overwhelming.  It's just the quantity of what needed to be done.

The stressful part of this:  meeting new people.  As an introvert, that is particularly difficult for me.  As the sister of someone who had a bubbly, vibrant personality, it was more difficult.  My sister and I are very different in how we interact with people.  On my drive to her town, I started getting cryptic messages from her friends via facebook.  My stress level rose.  Not only had I just lost my only sister, I was worried about how her friends perceived me.

I prayed a lot.  I need to be salt and light.  I need to be the hands and feet of Jesus.  But what I needed was to receive salt, light, and the hands and feet of Jesus.  I lost my mother 10 years ago.  She had been very sick, so I was able to prepare (as much as you can) and was not surprised at her death.  The death of my 44 year old sister was a shock.

But what I found were people who accepted me because I was the sister of someone they loved very much.  Some of them have actually talked with me and could accept what I needed to say. They loved her so much they filled the funeral home chapel.  So I'm going out on a limb, and it feels pretty shaky, and going out with her friends.

I want to know the Natalie they knew.