It's been eight days since I found out my only sibling had died.
It has been a whirlwind of clean up and meetings and parent and pet management. Travel. Lots of travel between my home and hers. After a few days, I was able to sleep again at night. Eating isn't a problem - so don't worry about that. I'm a stress eater :) On the plus side, I lost 5 lbs this week.
Planning a service. Trying to decide what needs to be handled when.
As a very task-oriented person, that part of it isn't too overwhelming. It's just the quantity of what needed to be done.
The stressful part of this: meeting new people. As an introvert, that is particularly difficult for me. As the sister of someone who had a bubbly, vibrant personality, it was more difficult. My sister and I are very different in how we interact with people. On my drive to her town, I started getting cryptic messages from her friends via facebook. My stress level rose. Not only had I just lost my only sister, I was worried about how her friends perceived me.
I prayed a lot. I need to be salt and light. I need to be the hands and feet of Jesus. But what I needed was to receive salt, light, and the hands and feet of Jesus. I lost my mother 10 years ago. She had been very sick, so I was able to prepare (as much as you can) and was not surprised at her death. The death of my 44 year old sister was a shock.
But what I found were people who accepted me because I was the sister of someone they loved very much. Some of them have actually talked with me and could accept what I needed to say. They loved her so much they filled the funeral home chapel. So I'm going out on a limb, and it feels pretty shaky, and going out with her friends.
I want to know the Natalie they knew.