Monday, January 19, 2009


I've spent my day off being utterly lazy but reading the blogs of people on the same journey I am on - namely weight loss.

Some of them are pretty depressing, actually. But our stories aren't so different. Some of us have a genetic predisposition for gaining weight, having inherited sorry metabolisms from our grandmothers and mothers - hello, diabetes? You are NOT invited to my house. Thanks, and buh-bye.

But also connected to our stories is how we have perpetuated our own demise, weight-wise, by continuing the bad habits taught to us by our fore-mothers. Interesting that fathers never come up in these stories? The only food I ever connect with my Daddy was his overly burnt barbeque chicken he always made. I thought it was mighty tasty but definitely not the comfort food my maternal grandmother (a diabetic) made. Oh how I miss her chicken and dumplings. And her, too. I miss her. But I digress.

There is also a turning point (hence the name of this blog) where we truly see ourselves in our completely unhealthy lives and know something has to give. I have been praying to lose weight for years. Then I got sick - with a metabolic chronic illness and gained even more weight. 35 pounds over the course of almost 4 years. You know what? At least 20 of those I put on myself through my own stupidity. Then my prayers changed - "heal me" what ever form that is and a transformation began.

First it began in my heart. I developed compassion for those with chronic illness, including my diabetic mother. To understand her, I needed to walk her path (or at least part of it).

I learned what real, unabating pain was like. It goes beneath the physical into your emotions, into your soul.

Then I began completely trusting God for my healing. Yes, I still take my medication and see the chiropractor for my pain, because He provided those for me so I can live a complete and whole life. BAM! Blessings began to pour out on my head. And I continued to gain weight.

When I became obvious that this was the last part of my healing - I prayed once again. Show me the way and I can't do this by myself. On that day, after much overindulgence, I marched myself to this laptop and signed up for Weight Watchers online. No meetings! I can do it in the comfort of my own home and on my own scale. So for 5 1/2 months I have been following this lifestyle.

Lifestyle, you say? Yes. This is not a diet. This is a live-it. I will need to live like this the rest of my life. And I am so happy to do it. I had to accept that when I get to my goal I will need to modify this live-it to maintain my weight, but I can never go back to the way I was. Why not? Because it was killing me. God made me for a higher purpose than that. My husband deserves it. My kids deserve it. And I deserve it.

My daily prayer? "Lord Jesus I need you today to help me make the right choices." It goes beyond food. But food is part of it. With His help, I will make it and I will honor Him while I do it.

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Finally made it to 35 pounds off!!

23 weeks ago this was me

This is me now

Okay so let me apologize in advance for the au naturale appearance of my face. I'm having a lazy day and didn't want to fool with much makeup. :)

Today I reached a mini-goal of sorts. This is where the last 50 pounds and the hardest part of this battle begins. I cannot remember the last time I was at this weight - I've got to believe that it is somewhere around 8 years. I know that is has been more than five.

But I feel good and I am happy and I know that I am honoring God with the way I am treating my body. And being down 35 pounds definitely doesn't hurt!

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Not 35 pounds yet... but very soon.

I'll be posting pictures when I get there in my fat pants and then in a new outfit.

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Bad Little Blogger :)

That's me.
So no update in a while but I've got a very good excuse.
Well, actually I don't... haha

Still doing the weight watchers thing. Honestly, the holidays were very difficult to stay on top of and I did manage to escape relatively unscathed. I don't have any new pictures right now because I don't look much different that I did before.

I think when I hit 35 pounds, which I'm pretty close to, I'll do it then. I'm glad to be back in the school routine because it really helps. It also helps that my DH bought me a small frig and microwave for my classroom and I can keep good stuff in it for meals and snacks. Isn't he THE BEST??

The new year brings a new perspective for me. I am healthier. I am happier. I am beginning to enjoy what I see in the mirror - but I still have a long way to go. But at least I am going.