On the floor watching a movie

When I was a little girl, I first watched "The Sound of Music" laying on the floor in front of my grandmother's TV.  I remember learning the story of Maria and the 7 children without a mother and the captain who learned to love again when he heard Maria sing.  The story captivated me and inspired me to become Julie Andrews when I grew up.  But, I never became Julie, although I will always have great admiration for her beautiful voice.

Last night, I caught the tail end of "The Sound of Music" and felt somewhat like a child again.  The ending never fails to make me tear up and I'm sure I have seen this movie more than any other.  But last night it was more than the story of Maria.  It was the memory of laying on that carpet.  It wasn't actually my grandmother's, it was my aunt's.  They lived together and although it was my aunt's house, I always equated it with my grandmother, "Ma Butch." 

The carpet has long since been replaced, but the last time I was at the house, I sat on the couch and looked at the memories I held in that room and in that house.  A lifetime of memories and so much love.  I looked at the spot where my sister and I lay and watched movies and TV.  I walked upstairs and remembered the room that used to have red and black shag carpet.  The blue room that held treasures, and the room converted to an office that used to be where I would sleep when I visited.  It was in that room that my sister and I would lay and giggle, while my aunt came down the hall and threatened us if we didn't get quiet. 

That house is where my family first met my future husband and met my children.  Where Easter Egg hunts were held in a perfectly flat, tree-less backyard.  The house where my grandmother let us dye eggs at the kitchen counter, stir alphabet soup on the stove, and where Pringles were always served in a glass dish.  It was my annual Thanksgiving pilgrimage with the BEST extended family I could ever have and the BEST cornbread dressing.  It was a place where I always felt at home.

After my aunt's death a few weeks ago, I said good-bye to the house in Nashville, Georgia.  It will be sold sometime and it's contents distributed, but it will always be in my heart.  The memories, the people, the laughter and tears - I am thankful for them.  It doesn't lessen the grief right now for it is still fresh and raw.

In this process of grief, I have discovered how important my family is.  I have reunited with my oldest friend (we met in the church nursey as infants.) I have felt Jesus hold my hand and calm the lump in my throat.  And I am grateful for it all.

The day of Resurrection

I've been to a lot of funerals lately - eight since June.  Funerals really make me think about my life - do I live the kind of life to justify the things I hope would be said about me?  I have learned some really incredible things about the people I went to celebrate - things they did silently and hoped to be anonymous, but were noticed and appreciated by someone.

My best friend died for me a long time ago, but the Good News is that He lives!  He defeated death and is going to help me defeat death someday.  That is what makes all these funerals I've been to bearable.  While these people are missing from my life, I know it isn't forever.  I am so happy that Jesus Christ is my best friend.

On that subject - I feel in our society we take on what we believe a best friend should be and apply it to our Saviour.  Although he is our best friend, we need to approach him with reverence and awe - this best friend is God after all.  He is holy - we are not.  He is perfect - we are not.  He defeated death - we did not.  He can save us - we can't do that.

This morning I sang great masterpieces from Bach, Beethoven, Handel... all celebrating the risen Saviour.  My best friend.  Here's the cool part... Jesus can be your best friend, too.  All you have to do is ask Him and believe.

Thanksgiving and Grief

... what a title, huh?  Well, that's what I am living in right now - at the same time.
What seems like two totally different and contradictory feelings or expression can actually co-exist and make sense.

On Thanksgiving day, a young man named Jonny, also a teacher where I work, passed away from colon cancer.  He had only been diagnosed since March, so his death seemed so quick to us.  He was 32 years old and it seems senseless to us.  Our school and family (for we are family at my school) are grieving and found ourselves with a deep sadness on the day we were gathered to give thanks for our blessings.

Jonny's wish from the beginning was for God to be glorified.  And He was.  Oh boy, He was and is.  The students have prayed more than ever before.  They have been first-hand witness to an unwavering and beautiful faith.  We see the results everyday of faith that is beautiful and transparent. 

So in the midst of our grief, we give thanks for a life now in Heaven, receiving his reward.  We give thanks for a young man who was not ashamed of the Gospel.  We give thanks for his example.  We give thanks for the beautiful way in which he worshiped.  We give thanks that he was our friend and our brother.

Our tears are not for him - they are for us, for we are mourning our loss.  We feel it everyday when he is not standing at the hand sanitizer machine with his large Chick-fil-a sweet tea.  We see it in the eyes of our students, when a memory occurs to them or when they are just plain sad.  So we will grieve.

And we thank God.

Withdrawal

So my daughter, the author of this blog: Simple Things in a Complex World is currently in England on a trip from school. 

They are staying in a centuries old manor, have hiked in the Lakes, attended church and youth group, and are forming bonds with classmates that I hope will last a lifetime.

And I miss her.

I am very proud of her for going on this adventure, but it is so hard keeping up when technology fails (her skype isn't working).  I am loving hearing of the new wonders she has seen and I can't wait to hear more.

This is just practice for when she is regularly gone - next year in college.  Oh my, 18 years have gone by so fast.  Where's the pause button?

Never forget

This is a bitter day. A day I will never forget. No sweetness about it except for the memory of joining in prayer with my friends. We were fearful and crying out to God, waiting on word from our loved ones and wondering if tragedy would come to Georgia as well.

My friend at Be Still and Know wrote a beautiful tribute after September 11th nine years ago.  I have always been a fan of Mr. Rogers, so her words just resonated with me.

Also, tomorrow is the sixth anniversary of Carter Martin's beautiful ascent to heaven, after a battle with cancer.  He was just 7 years old.  You can read his story here:  Carter Samuel Martin.  Although his family doesn't write on the page anymore, they are actively fighting the battle of childhood cancer, partnered with our school in an annual campaign to raise money for the cure.

I will never forget.

Headaches, Haircuts/color & Hypothyroids

Today is triple H day apparently. HA HA HA.

First today I woke with a headache - the result of low pressure from storms coming through. Not that we actually GOT rain. But we do need it. Sorry, I don't want your cures or remedies for my headache, as I get them frequently, and I am an expert at all cures and headache remedies.

Second I got my hair colored, highlighted and cut. I now look the way God intended me to look :). Katie at Absolute Hair in Buford is fabulous with my hair and gives the absolute best scalp massage in the world, giving relief to the aforementioned headache from H E doublehockeysticks. See - a tie-in between headaches and haircuts/color.

Third, and my mostest favorite topic in the world - not. Hypothyroids. I have one. And if my meds aren't right then it is more hypo than before. And that is what I have been dealing with for the last 12 months. Now, I can't completely blame the meds because I didn't drag myself to the doctor like I should have until last week. He wisely told me that "yes, you appear to be messed up." And took 11 tubes of blood. YAY me. Oh, and I didn't even faint. The blood taking lady (phlebotomist for you medical types) was GREAT. No bruise or anything. So that whole weight loss thing? Kind of blown. Not kind of. Just blown. The sad thing is this disease takes away any control that is possible until the medication is regulated. The weight came off before and it will come off again.

And how does this tie in to my other title words? More hypo = more headaches. I can deal with it because I have a great doctor who wants me to get better and get out of his hair (j/k) - but really does want me to get better - and a great God who can heal me with or without medication. But He is choosing with meds and I'm okay with that.

I am such a bad blogger I make you poor, poor people (okay the one person out there) wait 4 months for a new post. Maybe with school back in - I go back tomorrow - I'll get more into a routine. So, to whoever may be out there, I'm signing off for now and going to lay on the couch.

Yes! It's finally break!

I slept in this morning - it was quite delicious. I'm not sure if delicious is the right word, but it has already made my day happy and satisfying. Really, it doesn't take a lot.

Not that I'm going to lay around and do nothing. I'll be painting DD's bathroom (once she clears everything out - hint, hint), and probably planning something for dinner tonight. But overall it will be a quiet, unstructured day for the first time in many months. DH on the other hand is slaving away at some client's office doing accounting stuff. I am very knowledgeable about accounting stuff - HA. Well, at least I know a credit from a debit.

Oh and DD and I have planned a girl's trip to Savannah in June. Hopefully she will be recovered enough from her surgery (another bone graft - urg) to enjoy all the seafood we plan to indulge in.

Have a blessed day!